Emily writes: I have a dispute with my husband, Leonard, over bedsheets. I say the end of the top sheet with the wider hem should be up near the pillows. He routinely places it in any other direction and then falls asleep, so I can’t fix it. This forces me to sleep with a wrong-way sheet, which haunts me. Please order him to do it right.
This all depends on what kind of Leonard you married. I suspect that he knows how to make the bed properly, as I equally suspect that you would not marry a fool. But this leads me to the darker suspicion: that Leonard is doing it wrong on purpose in hopes that you’ll eventually bar him from even trying. I’ll make the order you request, but let me know if he comes up with new ways of getting it wrong. If you find him making a blanket fort or curling up inside the fitted sheet in the middle of the bare mattress, claiming, “It all looks the same when you’re sleeping,” we’ll both know what kind of Leonard he is.
